Ephesians 4:29 says:

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for
building up others according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (NIV).”

The word “unwholesome” means “corrupted” and refers to something that has degenerated from what is good. It is “worn out” and “no longer fit for use.”

Regardless of any subtleties in the meaning of the word “unwholesome,” Paul contrasts such “talk” with words which build others up. Clearly, what comes out of our mouth can be destructive. Sometimes it’s blatant, such as when we complain. Other times, it can be more subtle, like times we may remember what things “used to be like,” leading us to a place of discontentment.

In Numbers 11, the Israelites complained to Moses “If only we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt at no cost – also the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic. But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna!”

Ah, yes, the good old days of slavery in Egypt when everything was free! The Israelites had completely lost perspective and allowed this to seriously color their memory of the past. (For the record, God heard their complaint and brought quail – three feet deep as far as a day’s walk in every direction. Num. 11:31. What a mess!)

James 1 tells us to “consider it pure joy” when we face trials because the testing of our faith develops perseverance. “Perseverance must finish its work so that [we] may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (NIV)"

I’m sure that nearly all of us can point to times in the past that we miss. As a church body, God wants us to find contentment where we are. Many of us have great memories from the first thirty years of our church. Others may have such memories from other churches of which we’ve been a part. Often, however, like the Israelites we don’t remember (or we weren’t aware of) the sacrifices, hardships and heartaches that accompanied those times.

I’m all for celebrating and exhorting one another by the sacrifices that lead to the accomplishments of the past. We are truly blessed to have both a facility and a parsonage that we own free and clear. There are many who have ministered faithfully and tirelessly over the years. At the same time, there are a lot of heartaches that still need to be processed.

There is no question; we are clearly facing an uncertain time. But “uncertain” is far different that “hopeless” or “critical.” Let’s not lose our perspective like the Israelites, who seemed to completely forget the place from which they’d come and that God was both leading and providing for them in truly miraculous ways.

So, whether we talk about the past or the present, let’s be conscious of Paul’s exhortation that whatever we say should be said only for building others up and benefiting those who listen. Let’s not allow what we say to become “corrupted” so that it becomes a source of dissatisfaction or discouragement, whether to ourselves or to others. Let’s encourage one another that God is using this time to mature us, both individually and as a church body.

~ Bob Bylsma